21 October 2011

A gloomy Day

Today I went to see a new Rheumatologist after my old one (literally) retired!

The news wasn't that good. I also need to have lots more xrays and ultrasounds to further investigate the degeneration over the last 18 months.

There is a whole big long list of things going wrong with my body. Pain medication isn't working and I'm constantly struggling through pain 24 hours a day. I have medication to help me sleep and pain medication that just makes me like a zombie. (which I don't like) I take general pain medication and avoid the opiates as much as possible, when I can.

I am being referred to a pain management centre to try to work out a better pain management program to help me cope and to relieve pain.

I have had a lot of blood tests today, to check my kidneys, liver and inflammation.

The findings are extensive, and this is just a few - so I'm here whinging today - sorry :(

POLYARTHROPATHY - Osteoarthritis affecting multiple joints... HIPS, SHOULDERS worst.
FIBROMYALGIA - Muscular pain and burning muscles, tender points widespread. Nerve pain.

Extremely High levels of inflammation throughout my body.
Hip Trochanteric Bursitis (mostly LHS)
Hip Degeneration - osteoarthritis (Both hips)
Facet Joint degeneration - osteoarthritis
Shoulder bone abnormality RHS causing supraspinatus tendon tearing.
Shoulder Bursitis - Both shoulders
Shoulder Rotator Cuff tearing - Both shoulders
Osteoarthritis damage to both shoulders
Degenerative Knee problems
Degenerative Ankle problems
Plantar Fasciitis - why I can't stand on my feet in the mornings!!
Wrist and Ankle degeneration through the osteoarthritis
Deformation of index finger LHS - arthritis

I now am in need of Shoulder Arthroplasty - Basically shoulder replacements!!

I could be in line for a Hip Replacement!!

My left index finger has developed Heberden's nodes - a permanent bony outgrowth that often skews the fingertip sideways.

This is just my joints problems!! I also have other things like Hypothyroidism and Impaired Glucose Tolerance.

Then there is the emotional stuff I'm having to deal with - PFTT.

I think I will go have a glass of wine now, It can't hurt can it :)

I am 49 years old and feel 99.

If you got this far, thanks for reading and listening to my whinge for today. I'm trying to keep up a positive attitude as I know things could always be worse... but I'm really feeling Disheartened today - and I guess I worry about my art-producing abilities in the future.

Lots of Love & Hugs,

Me xo


  1. I have no words of comfort for you. All I can say is that I will keep you in my thoughts & hope that you will have some days when the pain eases slightly. Sending you a huge, but gentle, cyber hug.

  2. Oh my dear Lorri - tis hard for you to bear so much negativity so please do try and focus on all of the positive things you have in your life - healing thoughts winging your way as I write this and I will hold the wish for you to be well in my prayers


  3. lorri I'm so sorry you feel so bad. this should be the perfect time to smoke the herb! I hear its good for the pain.not that i would know anything about that. I hope you feel better soon.

  4. Lorri, I am so sorry you have to deal with all of this. I am sure you are probably better versed at this than I, but you must stay positive. There are lots of things you can do to calm inflammation that may at least lesson the pain. And you know I do believe laughter really is the best medicine :) Stream & giggle often :)

    Sending you feel good vibes - Kim (Bups)

  5. So sorry Lorri. Sending you positive thoughts and gentle (((hugs))).

  6. Hi Lorrie, just stopping by to say hello & send you another cyber hug.

  7. Hey Lorri, Sending you hugs! I can relate with alot of what you said - my body is old before it's time! I benefitted greatly from a pain management center. I hope the one you are referred to is good and helps you. Just do your best to stay positive and let's keep fighting to NOT let the pain win! Thank goodness for the escape and comfort our art gives us!

  8. MY darling Lorri, send me some of your pain and discomfort and I'll do my best to help you carry this miserable load. I'm sending my Angels to your side to help....call them to wrap their wings around you, feel their presence, keep the faith, let modern medicine do the work to heal you. I think giving yourself permission to have a bad day is very intelligent. I pray you have many more good then bad days. TY for letting me be a part of your world. You are loved and adored by many and especially by me.
    Peace and Much Love (((LORRIE))) OX

  9. I like to see your beautiful paintings on your blog, but I didn't know you paint them with so much pain. I cannot imagine how much pain you must have being referred to a pain management centre. Hopefully they can make a good plan to help you.
    Please keep painting your beautiful colorful work. Hopefully it helps you a little to think of some different than your body and gives you pleasure and some peace in mind.

  10. {{Lorri!}} Oh, huney huney huney. You know I feel your pain. It has been 9 years now for me dealing with this (RA, OA, DDD, AS, and FM, plus an unofficial 6th one, psoriatic). I went thru the anger, the denial, the fear, the dull negative perception of a future reality. And I finally surrendered to it, changed from a Type A perfectionist to a Type B whatever girl, and I focussed on what I really wanted to do. Now I'm happier than I've ever been in my life! Seriously. You can make this into lemonade so tasty you wondered why lemons were used for anything else. It takes time but it'll come. Don't give up, but do give into changing what is not healthy for you anymore. You will be in my thoughts and prayers, and please write me if you need a *shoulder* to cry or vent on. xoxoxo


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